I dating my ex friend

Recently, I ran into his very close friend, who I hung out with numerous times when I was with my ex.

It’s never OK to date your friend’s ex – and this is why

He asked for my number and has been chatty, inviting me to come meet him and his friends out, asking what I am up to, etc. At first I thought he just wanted to be friendly he recently moved very close to me but it has become very apparent that he is interested in something more. I could definitely be interested in "the friend" but is that crossing the line?

He doesn't seem to care at all lol and has mentioned to me that their friendship is not what it once was. To make the situation even odder, my ex has texted me a few times in the last few weeks saying hi or some dumb drunken texts. I don't think he knows anything, but the timing is weird.

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If the situation was reversed, I would be livid, so maybe that is my answer. What would you suggest I do? And if I do go out with my ex's friend, should I tell him? I think I would want to know, but I worry that it just might make the whole situation even more awkward. After more than a year, you don't owe your ex anything, nor does he owe anything to you.

Ask Steve - Should I Date My Ex's Friend

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Is it OK to date your ex’s friend?

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Lean into the feelings instead. Avoid doing things just to get back at your ex, like dating one of their friends in retaliation. Write down a list of reasons why you and your ex broke up. Think about the reasons you broke up with your ex in the first place. If you're concerned about your friend because of prior experiences with your ex, it's okay to express that. Just make sure to keep to the facts so that it doesn't look like you're bashing your ex.

Signs of an unhealthy relationship include constant fighting, belittling, volatility, manipulation, and jealousy. Get rid of stuff that reminds you of your ex. If you have items from the relationship, it may be harder to get over your ex. Get rid of anything sentimental that you own to help distance yourself from them. This will potentially reduce your negative feelings and help you maintain your friendship.

Stop following your ex on social media. Following what your ex and friend are doing online is unhealthy and could help feed negative emotions.


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Distancing yourself from that imagery may help you get over the breakup and prevent you from feeling angry or sad at the situation. You don't have to block your ex, but you can if it makes you feel better.

6 questions you should ask if you want date your ex's friend - HelloGiggles

Take a break from seeing your friend. Stop calling, texting, and asking to hang out with your friend. If you need to see them every day because you go to the same school or job, have a conversation with them so that they aren't confused as to why you stopped hanging out with them.

Distancing yourself from the new relationship may prevent you from getting jealous or angry. If negative feelings are still prevalent in your mind, it may be best to avoid both of them until you feel better about it.

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I still want the best for you, so I think I need a break from hanging out with both of you. I hope you can understand that. However, remember that your friend and your ex are both separate people from you, and that their relationships are their own. Focus on being the best person you can be. Taking time to focus on building your strengths can boost your confidence and help you move forward.

It can also help you gain a better understanding of who you are as a person, independent of other people in your life. Hang out with other friends to take your mind off the situation. Call other friends and make plans to hang out or put yourself in social situations so that you can meet new friends.


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